Ding dong the dork is gone *almost*

Suffice to say I am getting rid of Greg, but it comes with a cost of over $3,000. Not sure where it will come from but am going to find out. I am not comfortable asking for help from my family. I will have to or get evicted. I pray I can get some to tide it over. I usually always get the landlord caught up but then this is more than I can come up with now. Life is not always a picnic and will have to find something I can do from home. I just wish he would leave today. Talked to the landlord and he is only asking for this months rent and we will work on the other. He even is offering me 200 to cut down some small trees on the end of the duplex *both sides* and clean out the gutter. I am looking forward to getting rid of Greg.

Now I need to find a job I can do from home. A legit job that is.

music

music, time to play some.. v.

an uneven past

As the uneven mornings jailed and placed my thoughts convexed like a mosaic after a rupture, I supposed there among a million stars the night before were dreams of flowers and permanence.

v.

As of late-

So I'm taking a math class at school, then two classes online. It's QUITE diffcult to keep up with, since I'm working so much. I'm glad I'm doing something with myself, don't have time to think or care about the troubles of the world, since when has it cared about me?

I went to barter fair for three days and came back with lots of jewelry and a refreshed mind.

My family is having a difficult time, My cousin has been going through the process of telling everyone that she is pregnant out of wedlock, my other cousin and his wife are getting divorced after she got pregnant from her "BFF danny", and now the pressure is coming down on me to come out to the family. They all kinda know but my parents seem to be waiting for me to say something.
I'm really feeling the heat from my cousins, Angel doesn't want any of our family to know because in the end they would never accept it, but its starting to inject it's poison into our relationship. Never been with someone for two years, (coming up on halloween) and I have a lot of fears about getting a house and starting a permanent life together... but I'm remaining loyal and I trust that God will point us in the right direction.
sorry it's short had to write this in the breakroom at work! :P
keep working hard Aetheri, and don't forget about this place

Been missing too much

I have been alive and kicking but this school year is far too crazy to understand. I am meeting myself coming and going. This month has been the month from hell. Last Monday, G's parents were involved in a head on collision between a scooter *the heaviest one* and a car. The car seems to have been driven by a teenager who was distracted. The collision was pretty intense. Scooter went up in the air and fell down on G's Mom's leg. She ended up losing it above the knee. She was in IC until today when they hopefully moved her. His father was knocked out until the EMT's showed up. He walked away with scratches and his helmet scratched. At least it wasn't his brains. Both were wearing leather coats which took most of the hit. Unfortunately, her leg was destroyed below the knee, not even enough to find. This has affected the kids greatly.

This past weekend we had 40ish degrees and both girls had a game. I tried to dress us all warmly, but unfortunately not warm enough. I have now missed 3 days this week. The girls aren't suffering from swine flu or strep. I got a prescription because I seemed to get the worst case. My lungs suck at healing.

This weekend is homecoming and not sure how all this is going to go. I look forward to having actual money to get my kids what they need. Had $40 for groceries and gas. I got 30 bucks in gas and 10.51 for groceries. I hope I can stretch this for a while. So happy fate seems to find favor with me. Not sure the world does.

Here's hoping your month has been much better.

Listening to myself think...

Bottle Path - We Did It!,
originally uploaded by polyartgirl.

Trying to be more active online... on FB and maybe on blogs too. I'm writing a lot, but mostly it's gibberish in my paper journal, some online in obscure blogs that nobody reads. Just trying to get it all out.

Drinking hot coffee for lunch. I love days like this. Getting a million and one things done, checking off the list, with visions of too many unrecognizable dreams coming into my consciousness. I try to do all of it right, but I'm sure I'll stumble and fall once in a while.

I've been working on a huge project at home... a path made of bottles. from the front of the house around to the back gate.

in the cycle

just torn up shredded in a cycle of pain surface then submerged
as the night falls at this moment i listen to the late night radio - its jamming and its calming .. v.